Valentines Day is almost upon us and for most people, it’s a day to show your significant other how much you love them. A day for ‘in-love’ couples so to speak. When in reality we have 365 days in the year to do just that. However, many people often think that disabled people don’t date, don’t have relationships, don’t love or be loved. Although that really couldn’t be further from the truth. The Undateables is a Channel 4 TV series that sets out to prove that disabled people do all of the above and more. Its a dating show for disabled people and it follows them during their search of finding love with the help of dating agencies through a series of matchmaking and blind dates.
Now in its 8th series, The Undateables has shown and raised awareness of a wide range of disabilities both mental and physical as well as visible and invisible. Becky Dann is one of the participants in the latest series of The Undateables. Today, I’m thrilled to have the lovely Becky share her story. She explains what it means to be disabled and date and why The Undateables has helped her realise she isn’t undateable.
Becky’s Story: The Undateables
It’s come to the end of Series 8 of ‘The Undateables’ and I was lucky to have been part of it.
I have been a fan of the show since the first series but it wasn’t until I reached an age where I started dating that I really started to relate to the people on it.
The way I feel about being disabled and dating is down to how society has treated me. I applied for the show because I was continuously let down and most of the time it was because people acted as though my disability was something awful that I should hide away. I felt undateable.
Not every disabled person feels this way, I have a few disabled friends that have had long-term relationships, which is great, but there is a large portion of the disabled community that does find dating difficult and that shouldn’t be dismissed or ignored because others don’t find it difficult.
I am a big believer in educating people and I want more people to understand that being disabled doesn’t mean people don’t want to have relationships. I think that this show is an amazing platform to educate people about different disabilities, especially when the show attracts a lot of younger viewers.
Admittedly, I had my reservations about going on the show to start with and that was actually down to me worrying about what the disabled community would say, rather than worrying about what able people would say. That was until I came across Carrie’s blog where she writes about how the show helps the disabled community and it helped me realise that I should stick to my beliefs.
It upsets me to think that the disabled community feels the show exploits disabled people because I don’t agree at all. Having been part of the show I know that the people making it aren’t sat around laughing, they’re genuinely lovely people. They never do anything that you don’t want to do, they take care of your access needs, and so for me, they paid for my taxis to filming locations. They always made sure I was comfortable and if I felt uncomfortable filming would stop. Not once did I feel ‘exploited’. I cannot put into words how amazing the team are.
I’m so glad I went on the show because I have had so many people contacting me, people who also have Scoliosis and who also feel ‘undateable’ and they’ve thanked me for making Scoliosis more visible because it isn’t talked about enough in the media.
I no longer feel undateable because this show has helped me to realise that no one is undateable. We all want the same things and the world isn’t all that bad. I know I will find someone someday and the show has given me the confidence to believe in myself more.
A special thank you to Becky for sharing her story and thoughts on being disabled and dating. For more from Becky you can visit and follow her at the following links.
Website: Rebecca Dann
You can watch The Undateables online, now on All4.
Photos courtsey of Becky Dann, The Undateables and The Sun.